Monday, February 20, 2012

Why it Sucks to be President

Today is Presidents Day. The day in which we honor old, mostly dead, elitist, white men (we honor past Presidents, not currently serving. Until Obama leaves office, it will still be a remembrance of dead, white men). We honor these men by offering discounts on furniture, mattresses, or cars. We might think it is awesome to be President of the United States. A free house with staff dedicated to making you happy. A cool security team. The power! All sorts of perks and benefits.

But to tell you the truth, I would never want to be the President of the United States. And if you are smart, you don’t want to either. Despite my interest in Presidential history and politics, I don’t want to be anywhere near that job. Why? (besides the hard decisions and huge responsibility)

1)      Everyone Wants You Dead.

The President is the most powerful person in the country and arguably, in the world. They are often described as the “Leader of the Free World”. They are in control of the strongest military (and a nuclear power) and is leader of the world’s largest economy.

You don’t think that makes you the target of every terrorist group, enemy nation, and wacko with a gun and a crush on a celebrity? These people all want you dead. But the biggest problem doesn’t come from terrorists or a rogue nation. Is the last group, the crazy lone-wolf with a gun, that you need to be afraid of. We have a huge Intelligence network to deal with terrorists (although that hasn’t always been successful) and most nations know that if they were to be behind an assassination, the consequences would be dire. We don’t exactly have an agency to monitor each and every individual in the United States. At least if they don’t have a huge criminal background.

Three out of four successful Presidential assassinations were committed by one mentally disturbed individual (yes, I believe Oswald acted alone). Lincoln was shot by John Wilkes Booth who was involved in a small conspiracy. Most unsuccessful attempts were done by individuals with no connections to a larger group. Only two, one on Truman by Puerto-Rican Nationalists and one on Clinton by bin Laden, involved a larger conspiracy with an organized group (which begs the question, why the hell aren’t we investing more into mental healthcare?).

So every day, you need to wake up and worry that some nut job with delusions of grandeur wants to take you down just so the dog next door will stop yelling at him.

2)      You Have to Please Everyone While Pleasing No One.
You are President of the United States. At the same time, you are the unofficial/ceremonial head of your party. You are in an awkward position of showing liberal/conservative you are to your party while at the same time trying to play to moderates and those across the aisle as leader of the nation.
This is best evident during the primary season. Mitt Romney is downplaying is more moderate streak as Governor of Massachusetts to appeal to the idiot conservatives who prefer Rick Santorum for God only knows. When (if) he gets the nomination, he’ll start playing up some of his more moderate tendencies to independent voters, if the GOP/Tea Party will allow it. Sorry to be such a partisan ass in this paragraph, but it happens with both parties. Clinton and Obama needed to win over the Liberal base and then Obama needed to switch gears and go for the moderates.
If you go too far left or right, you leave the other side furious and vowing to get revenge and the moderates are made uncomfortable. If you make a compromise, you upset the opposing side because they didn’t get everything they wanted and you upset your side because you caved in (see: the left and anything Obama has ever done as President). You are always cursed out for everything you have done. Mostly by the opposition, partly from your own side. It will be very rare when most people on all sides of the aisle are happy with your decision. Unfortunately, happiness and bipartisanship doesn’t make for good television and it will quickly fade into obscurity.

3)      Any little thing you do could ruin your career.

In 1992, George H.W. Bush was running for re-election. He decided to visit the National Grocers Association convention in Orlando, FL where he had a hands-on demonstration of a check-out scanner. A New York Times writer (who wasn’t there) wrote a scathing article about how the President was “amazed” by this technology and that he was out of touch with the common man. The story was overblown, but it was a good story used to pin the blame on him for the recession because he was so out of touch with everything. He lost re-election to Bill Clinton.
 
Granted there was much more that worked against Bush that year than just that one incident, but it was a story that stuck. An innocent little photo-op turned into a disaster (although, he should know the power of a bad photo-op).

When you are President or are running for President, any little thing that you do or say can bite you in the ass. Howard Dean was rising in the Democratic Primaries in 2004. He lost momentum after he placed third in Iowa. Then this happened. After the infamous ‘Dean Scream’, he became a punch line and dropped out before Super Tuesday. Edmond Muskie was considered the front-runner for the Democrats in 1972. After a series of nasty attacks against him and his wife, he broke down and cried during a news conference. Even though he won Iowa and New Hampshire, he lost momentum and George McGovern won the nomination (it probably didn’t help that the attacks on him were orchestrated by Nixon in a very dirty campaign).

Something that happened years ago can come back. George W. Bush’s drunk-driving record. Grover Cleveland’s bastard child. George McGovern had to replace running mate Thomas Eagleton because of his history of depression and shock therapy treatment. Anything Bill Clinton has ever done in his life.

Hell, even family members can get you in trouble. Does the name ‘Billy Carter’ mean anything to you?

Granted, it is not guaranteed that a little mistake will ruin your life (Clinton polled well during his impeachment). But they do become a thorn in your side and prevent you from effectively leading.
I frankly do not know how we will ever elect another President again. With Facebook and Twitter, 95% of the population between 18 and 25 is unelectable. This was something that didn’t hassle past leaders. Now, anyone can freely look at your profile (or hack it) and learn about your wild youth. I have written plenty of things on tumblr, Facebook, and blogspot, that could be used against me in the future for either political or private attacks.

Why does this happen? Well…

4)      You have no privacy, freedom.
For some reason, being the most powerful man in government makes the media want to know everything you do. They will do anything to know everything going on in your administration and private life. A slip up is guaranteed to make the news.
Because everyone wants you dead, you need to have tight security. Gone are the days in which the President can duck out of the White House and take a walk at night. You can’t freely meet people unless they go through security or you have an elaborate plan placed ahead of time.
Want to make love to your wife/secretary? There is going to be a secret service agent outside that door. Sometimes they can help (they would warn LBJ when his wife was coming) but if you have any shame, you are going to be embarrassed to know that the person who’s sole duty is to protect you is being used to cover up an affair.

You know all those photos of a President sitting alone in the Oval Office, looking dejected or frustrated? Well, there are at least two people in that room; the President and a photographer.
All that stress from the job you want to share with your spouse or friend? Well, I hope they have high level security clearance because you can’t tell them squat.

5)      These Problems Will Not Go Away After Leaving Office

After four to eight years, you have managed to leave the White House not in a flag-draped casket and you now want to return to being a private citizen. That’s not going to happen, because you are now a former President. All the crap mentioned earlier still applies until you die.
People still want you dead. George H.W. Bush was the target of an assassination attempt after leaving office. So was his son. Of course, you get lifetime Secret Service protection, right? Not anymore. Every President after Bill Clinton (Bush, Obama, etc.) only has ten years of protection, which means you will need to pay for private protection if you still feel threatened.

You might not be in politics anymore, but people will not forget about/forgive you for your administration. Mention Bill Clinton in front of a conservative over 55 and see their face turn red. Mention George W.’s name in front of a Liberal under 30 and you will get a similar result. Conservatives hate Franklin Roosevelt and Liberals hate Ronald Reagan, and both men are dead. Whether people will like you or not depends on the passage of time and the mood of the future. And you can’t control it.

People may not be as interested in you anymore, but you still don’t have privacy. You have crazies out there that want to kill you, you have a whole ideology worth of people who don’t want to let you off the hook, and you can’t go out to the store without causing a fuss. Everyone knows who you are and unless you want to go for a disguise or plastic surgery, they won’t let you alone.

Sometimes I think John McCain, John Kerry, Al Gore, Bob Dole, Michael Dukakis, Walter Mondale, George McGovern, Hubert Humphrey, Barry Goldwater, Adlai Stevenson, Thomas E. Dewey, Wendell Willkie, Alf Landon, Al Smith, John Davis, James Cox, Charles Evans Hughes, William Jennings Bryan, Alton Parker, James G. Blaine, Winfield S. Hancock, Samuel Tilden, Horace Greeley, Horatio Seymour, George McClellan, Stephen Douglas, John Fremont, Winfield Scott, Lewis Cass, Henry Clay, Rufus King, DeWitt Clinton, and Charles Cotesworth Pinckney should have been happy that they never became President.

(Sorry for the random line spacing between paragraphs. I have changed it multiple times but it refuses to accept it.)

Monday, February 6, 2012

Peace of Mind?

I have my first session with a therapist tomorrow. I’ve been to a therapist before, but this is the first one with a new therapist. If you couldn’t tell from most of my posts on Tumblr, I have issues that need to be worked out.

To be honest, I feel like my short-term issues might be over with. I don’t want to jinx it and I have had a feeling before in which I thought I was “over” something but it came back with a vengeance. But I feel happy and content. Not just the temporary happiness I have felt in the past month, but a genuine feeling that things are okay. I had a bit of a revelation last night as I was biting my nails during the Super Bowl. It really gave me some peace of mind. It reinforced the good in my life that I was trying to convince myself didn’t exist. The negative things I was feeding myself could no longer stand up. It was like finding the perfect counter-argument against every single stupid conservative argument ever made and getting them to shut up for life.

I still have a long way to go before my problems are solved. But I hope to gain the tools to fix my life and make it the way I want it, not the way my stupid social anxieties have made it. I’ll have to see if this feeling of peace and “overness” is permanent before I bury some hatchets. But I hope that will be soon.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

60 Day Notice


I got a letter in the mail today. It was from the apartment complex that I am currently living at. My father and I have until February 15th to decide if we are staying in this apartment or not. The lease expires on April 15th and we need to give a 60 day notice if we intend to leave.

I hate moving. I haven't moved much in my life. I don't know if you can count moving in and out of college as "moving". For most of my life, I've lived in one house in Brockport, NY, which is now my mother's home. My first real move came after I graduated College in 2010. I moved into a small apartment in my current complex in June of that year. I stayed there for about a year until April of 2011. My father finally broke up with his girlfriend and we decided to get a place together. That is where I have been for the last year. Actually, I almost forgot about an earlier move. I did move in at another place here in Leesburg sometime in 2007 or 2008 with my father. That may have been my first real move. That place wasn’t too bad, but it had a communal laundry, the neighborhood wasn’t great (not too bad, but not as good as the current one), the pool was never open, and it had mice. Not a terrible place to live, but not as nice as the current place.

I have to say, I love this place. I've never needed much in my life, and I will be content if this is the largest place I will ever live in (other than my mother's home). The complex has nice facilities (even if I rarely use them) and it's in a nice part of town. Leesburg is kind of boring, but I still like it here. I would prefer to stay in the Northern-Virginia/Maryland region because of the history and politics. If my friends ever come down to visit me, accommodations wouldn't be a problem and they can get to and from Dulles really easily if I can't get them there myself.

Like I said, I hate moving. It's not so much the emotional baggage of leaving a place that I once called "home”. Actually, I don’t really consider any of these places a “home”. My “home” will always be (for now), my mother’s home.

I just hate packing. I have so much crap. I never organize things when I pack. I end up with about a million miscellaneous boxes with things like a single shoe, random receipts, dirty change, a coat hanger, and an extension cord. All of which I will need at some point, but won't be able to find later because it is in the back of the closet under four other random boxes. Half of my boxes are boxes I haven’t looked through in years. I actually found perishable food from Wells in some of my boxes last year. And some of that food wasn’t from my Senior year… YUCK! I actually kind of like organizing and consolidating boxes. But I always slack off, my allergies act up, I forget to pack half the things lying around, and just rush to get everything into something.

I’m not physically strong, so I hate moving large furniture. Since we have been living here, my father has acquired much more… I have to say, most furniture was not designed with moving in mind. Most of it is awkwardly shaped, has nothing to grab on to, and is heavy as hell. The newer stuff is light, but the older furniture is made out of real wood. REAL WOOD! I always have some kind of emotional breakdown, wishing I was strong and wasn’t such a disappointment to my father. And of course stairs are a huge problem. There has never been a straight set of stairs at any of the places I have lived in. Why do so many places feel the need to design the stairs like an M.C.Escher drawing? So many angles! So many turns! Those three little steps followed by five feet of flatness just for three more little steps! Random steps with huge drop offs next to them! ARGH!

My father is the kind of person who does a move all at once. Heaven forbid, we split the move over two days. When I came down in 2010, my father and I left New York in the morning but we had to stop and pick up some stuff from my sister's ex-boyfriend in Mansfield, PA. We wasted three hours packing up my sister's stuff and chopping up old furniture that my father had stored there for a while (something he promised would be done by the time we got there...). We had to dispose of it, because disposing of it himself would have taken some effort on his part. So we needed to pack up junk, just to throw it away in Virginia. Mansfield is pretty early on the Rochester-to-Leesburg route, so we had another five hours of driving before we got to our destination.

It was late by the time we got back. It was also a hot and humid summer night. I was tired. But no, we had to move EVERYTHING in that night. I would have preferred to have gotten a hotel for the night and move in the next day, but NOOOOOO. We had to work the next day! Yup, by noon the day after I had moved in, I was at work. Putting in a half day. Would it have killed us to have taken a full day off to unpack a little and get some things organized? Or at least rest? I guess he really needed that money.
When we got the new (current apartment), we had to move out during the cold, pouring rain. Oh, we didn’t HAVE to move out that day. It was warm and sunny the next day, but noooo, ALL ON THAT DAY! We really couldn’t have split it up between two days? Random boxes of junk that I don’t need (plus many boxes that belonged to him and my sister), plus some light and unnecessary furniture could be moved on one day, and the rest could be moved on the next. Seeing how we weren’t traveling very far, if I desperately needed something, I could have just walked over and gotten it. Well, I guess I need to take truck rental into consideration and how much it would cost for an extra day… WAIT! We borrowed a vehicle from work to do that move! There was no truck rental! AHHHHHHH!

Well, I guess I’ll have to talk to my father when he gets back on Monday to see what he is planning to do. I would prefer to stay, but money might be an issue. I don’t know if we’ll have jobs in the upcoming 12 months. We don’t want to back out of a lease agreement, but a month-by-month lease charges more than a 12-month lease. This place is fairly cheap, compared to the area. I wouldn’t mind moving in with my father’s girlfriend. She is nice and has a lovely home, but I don’t feel like I could be myself there. She doesn’t have a problem with me and she won’t force her lifestyle on me, but I still would feel weird there. It’s also in the middle of nowhere, so a car will be essential. If my friends do visit me, accommodations shouldn’t be a problem, but getting them to and from the airport (or bus station or whatever) would be a problem if I am working and/or can’t drive.

Personally, I would like to have my own little place again while my father lives with his girlfriend. But getting a car/license would be very important for that to happen. I doubt I’ll get either before April 15th, let alone February 15th. Like I said, I’ll have to discuss this with my father when he gets back. I like my current situation and I don’t want to have to move again.